Negativity

I recently have had an anonymous commenter that many of you have noticed. I am going to write this one post and then we ALL are going to move on including the person that has had some not so nice things to say. With blogger I do have the option of approving the comments before they appear on my blog. I have not felt the need to do this and still do not at this point. I also will not erase those comments that are not so nice. We are all entitled to our own opinions and in some instances I have taken great advice from what others have had to say. When people are negative I often giggle and wonder why they took the time to drag another person down. I often find it even funnier that these comments are often left anonymously. I truly believe these people are looking for attention and I find it so sad that they look for this attention by hurting others. I will not fuel these comments and so after this post I will not try to explain myself to these people. I thank all of you that stood up for our family when the comments recently appeared but from now on feel free to skip over the negativity and leave the comment you intended to before you read the thoughts of someone that would rather bring someone down than lift them up. 

So those that do not like my family either because it is larger than the average 2.2 children per family or if its because we had to use fertility or because we gave all of our children the right to life please move on and find a blog that you do enjoy reading. Our blog is not a homework assignment so there is no need for you to read it. Just like I do not read blogs on ufo's. I just do not have an interest in them!

When I was pregnant with the quads I was really quick to erase any kind of negativity that I received. Pregnant with four I was very emotional and I did not do well with any kind of rude comment. I needed my days to be filled with love and support. Now these comments do NOT affect me because no matter what someone thinks I would never have changed a single decision that my husband and I made. It wasn't necessarily the path I thought I would go down in life but God knew the entire time what path he would lead our family down. Those comments can not hurt me when every morning we go into the nursery there are four babies with huge smiles on their face kicking their little legs as hard as they can because they are so excited to see their mom, dad, brother and sisters. We are a large family and every single member of it is loved unconditionally.

Supporting our alma mater! Go BISON!!!

Please don't forget to vote for 'The Littlest Lesnaus' if you enjoy reading about us. We are currently in 6th place but only 2 away from 5th! It has been a back and forth battle for days and we have til May 8th to stay near the top. It has been a closer race than any presidential election ever so come on over and vote!!

Walk for Babies

Tomorrow our family will be walking for an organization that means so much to us after we gave birth to four amazing miracles 9 weeks early. Because of the research the March of Dimes has done over the years our preemies had a wonderful start to life even though they couldn't even breath without support when they were born. It is not to late to donate to the Walk for Babies. Your donation will help other babies like Tate, Kenzie, Rylan and Isabella who are born to early. Thank you for all those who have already supported us in our walk. 

The Bump

I wrote this post a couple of weeks ago and it has been sitting in my draft folder and I wasn't sure if it was one that I would hit 'publish' with. After writing this post I realized I needed to write it for me. I needed to work through some of the guilt I have had with my pregnancy. Writing about it was the best therapy for me. I have decided to publish it because I think so many of us as mommies have guilt over some aspect of our life as moms; our pregnancy, our delivery, postpartum depression, going back to work, feeling we don't spend enough time with our children, and the list can go on and on. I hope we all can move past this guilt we feel because we are all awesome moms when it comes down to it!

Recently on my twins group we shared pictures of our last days pregnant with our twins. I thought it would be fun to pull pictures of the last day of all three of my pregnancies. And then I started really thinking about each one of my experiences of having a baby bump. I am not by any means a cute pregnant person. I don't carry small but that is hard when I had a twin pregnancy, a 9lb6oz pregnancy and a quadruplet pregnancy but I loved being pregnant. I love feeling life growing inside me. I love day dreaming about whether I am carrying a boy or girl. I love preparing to add another one (or 4) to our family.

I do feel I got jaded with my pregnancies though. I never had a pregnancy that wasn't full of worry. There was always something that was more than the average pregnancy worries. With the twins I never felt that I would carry both to term. We had already suffered two miscarriages and every single appointment I went to I was worried that I would not see two heart beats. Then with Drew the pregnancy started out well. We had not planned on becoming pregnant so soon after the twins and never thought we would get pregnant on our own so once the shock wore off we were good until his 20 week ultrasound where it was discovered he had a cleft lip. We declined further testing to see if there were any chromosomal issues and we would not be 100% sure if his palate was involved until the day he was born. The rest of his pregnancy was spent looking at pictures of baby's with clefts and it was hard and very discouraging because of course we only found the bad ones on google. Then we got pregnant with the quads and that was by far no where near a normal pregnancy. Some days I long for a pregnancy where I would take a hpt and see a + and nine months later deliver a beautiful baby without the worries of a multiple pregnancy or anomalies but even with the worries of all 3 pregnancies I was given 7 perfect in every way children.

Since the quads have been born I have dealt with a lot of guilt with how their pregnancy ended. The delivery was awesome and everything worked out great. Family got to come into the post op area which we had been told would not happen. All the babies got wonderful care. I got 1 of the 2 doctors that I really wanted to deliver me. But I still felt let down every. single. time. I thought about their birth. I have spent a good part of 8 months trying to figure out why I couldn't let go. 

So the other day when I pulled out the pictures of my pregnancy belly with the other kids I started thinking about their births and both of those days were so amazing. I am not a person who only remembers the pain that came with labor. I can remember how the room was set up. The feeling of the contractions. The shakes I get when I am transitioning. I remember my mom and sister who would have taken the pain of the contractions away form me if they could have. Both of the older kids births were everything I could have imagined and this is where I think the guilt with the quads birth lies. Everything I had imagined for their birth did not happen. I had planned on spending weeks in the hospital on bed rest. Getting to know the nurses and the staff well in the weeks that I would spend there. I had imagined we would know the date of delivery and Paul & I would spend the last night together before welcoming our little ones with a great dinner for two in my hospital room. I wanted to write to my unborn children one last letter before I got to meet them. Family would come up to the hospital in anticipation of the moment they would learn how many girls and boys we had. The "plan" that I had didn't play out as I thought it would and this is were I have felt let down. Because my other two pregnancies were inductions I have never had the moment were the "water breaks" and one is in labor. Mine were always planned. My "water" broke quickly the night the quads needed to come when Rylan's heart rate was down. Everything ended up working out perfectly; it just wasn't planned like my other births were.

I have kept a journal of all of my pregnancies and the following are the letters I wrote the night before the "planned" induction of the girls and Drew:

Tuesday, April 1, 2008
Oh my gosh. Tomorrow is the day and I am just giddy. I can not believe it has been over nine months since we found out we were expecting you. I can not wait to find out who you are and give you names. Today I have had mixed emotions. I am so happy that you will be here but I am sad at the same time because I will no longer be pregnant. I will no longer feel you inside of me. I have found such comfort and joy always feeling you two move around inside of me. It is such a neat feeling and if one or both of you are girls, I can't wait for you to expereince that joy some day. Daddy spent the day working outside and I went for one last pedicure and then went and stocked up on groceries. We are just going to sit down and have dinner for the last time with just daddy and I. We have to call the hospital at 5:30 tomorrow morning to make sure it isn't too busy and then we will head there around six. I don't think either of us will sleep well tonight because we are so excited. Grandma Pat and Nicole are also thrilled and are coming to the hospital bright and early to spend the day waiting for your big arrival. We then will have lots of calls to make because everyone is so excited to hear who you are. We have lots of prayers being said for your safe delivery. Mom is going to try and rest tonight but I am so excited. I am going to enjoy feeling you move around for the last time. I love you my sweet children.

Sunday, June 20, 2010
Tonight is the last night that you and I get to spend together just you and I because we are getting induced tomorrow morning! We finally get to meet you!! Today was Father's Day and we had a wonderful day as a family of four. It was the weirdest feeling to know that tomorrow I will be a mother of three beautiful children and that Natalie & Aubrey will be big sisters. We have told them over and over that grandma will be here when they wake up and then Katelynn, our babysitter, will come over and play with them and then after nap daddy will come and get them so they can come and see mommy and Bop-Bop  at the hospital. They always say "and hold her" when they go over the day. I can't wait for you to meet your sisters. I have been having frequent contractions today more than any other day so if you want to come sometime tonight that would be just fine. This evening I took a bath and realized I only have a couple of hours left of feeling you inside me. This is something I know I will miss after you are born. I want you to know how much I already love you and I can't wait to meet you in a couple of hours. You and your sisters mean everything to me and you all are my greatest joys. I pray that your delivery goes smoothly and that you are healthy. I love you my sweet child.

I didn't have a chance to write an entry the night the quads were coming but I know if I would have the entry would have been full of joy and anticipation as we would soon be meeting our little ones for the first time but it is also would have included worries for the health of our preterm babies. 

I will move on and be grateful that I got to spend my entire pregnancy at home. That all of our family was able to make the birth. And that I delivered 4 healthy babies between 10:24 & 10:28 on the night of August 9. The sadness I feel when I think about the quads delivery needs to be replaced with joy and I am working on it. It just has taken longer than I thought it would.

The Happiest Place on Earth

Because we have a large family and more than one set of multiples Paul and I decided last year that we would have a first birthday party for all the kids and then after that we would be doing family trips instead of birthday parties. There are three reasons for us doing this: 1)it is not cheap to have birthday parties anymore and I would rather spend that money having fun with my kids than spend it on little goody bags that the kids forget about the second they get home 2)because we have multiples I also feel bad that families feel obligated to buy each child a present. Four gifts at one time adds up fast. 3)My kids have way more toys than they need. I cringe every time a holiday comes around that involves getting more 'stuff'. 'Stuff' is the last thing we need.

If you remember we took the girls to Disneyland for their 4th birthday in which I accompanied them riding around in a fancy scooter (I was sooo happy to ditch that thing this year!). They again wanted to go to Disney for their 5th birthday and with the quads still content to sit in a stroller we decided it would be a great time to take everyone. We waited until spring break was over and we went during the middle of the week. Paul's parents joined us and it worked out perfect. The babies would join us in the mornings and then they were taken back to the hotel for their afternoon nap.

We did take our quad stroller and had many people doing double takes. For the most part everyone was great and very respectful. I only had one lady that I had to gently ask to move on as she started asking for every one's name. If I would have been on my toes I would have said winter, summer, fall & spring! I was also told once I was rude when I asked a lady to please not touch my children. She proceeded to tell me I was weird and rude as she turned her nose up at me. I was a bit surprised because I was actually very kind about it and another mother who was behind me validated I was not rude but she was very rude. My soap box for today is: It is not okay to touch babies that you do not know if you have not been asked; even if it is their feet. Babies are very flexible and as soon as you get done putting your germy, unwashed hands on a babies feet those same feet go right into their mouth. Moving on...

The girls were once again in love with all the princesses and they have a new area to meet the princesses and the girls were in heaven when both Ariel and Cinderella were there. Natalie is in love with Cinderella and Ariel is Aubrey's favorite. And Drew well I think he likes all of them! We did not get to ride on Radiator Springs Racers in the new Cars area because the shortest wait the entire time we were there was 75 minutes. And the fast passes line in the mornings was pretty much the same wait time just to be able to go back later in the day. We were all fine with waiting until our next visit except for Paul's parents who we sent back one evening to go spend some time at the park since they had been with the babies all day. They waited for 90 minutes before getting on. They said it was a neat ride but not long enough after waiting in line for an hour and a half!

The babies did awesome and besides a little cold that everyone started getting on the last day it was a successful trip. It felt good to get the first trip out of the way and to know that it is possible for us to go on vacation. Our next trip is already in the planning mode and it is to the Oregon coast in June to celebrate Drew's birthday.

 

 

Thank you to everyone who has been voting for 'The Littlest Lesnaus' on Circle of Mom. We are currently in 2nd place which is absolutely amazing but we have been going back and forth between 2nd, 3rd & 4th! Remember you can vote once every 24 hours per device. All you have to do is click on the link in the top right corner and vote for us. No registering even needed which means no password to remember and no annoying emails!!

Need your votes!!

Last year when we found out we were expecting triplets (haha...joke was on us for two weeks!) I started this blog to keep family updated and to make a journal of our journey. I never knew how much this blog would come to mean to me. I love to share our family joys, our struggles with a large family which includes having 7 kids in 4 years, and it also has become an outlet for me to work through emotions. 

What has amazed me the most since starting 'The Littlest Lesnaus' is the number of people who follow along with our family. I think we are kind of boring and monotonous, I spell way to many words wrong and my elementary teachers probably cringe at all of my grammatical errors but people still keep coming back! I have over 11,000 page views a month. That alone amazes Paul and I. Now if only we could charge $1 per pageview.... 

Okay back to why I need your votes! There is a site called Circle of Moms that has over 6 million viewers and they are having a contest for the Top 25 Moms of Multiples blogs. I would love to be able to be one of the Top 25 so that others who are facing infertility or the blessing of expecting 2, 3 or even more little ones may be able to find our blog through Circle of Moms. You can find a button on the top right of my blog to vote for 'The Littlest Lesnaus' that will take you to the voting page. You can then scroll down til you see our family picture and all you have to do is click LIKE. Super easy. The coolest thing is you can vote every 24 hours from the same computer/network. So you could vote from home AND work AND your cell every 24 hours!! The current leader (another quad momma!!) is already at over 500 votes. I am at 40. I have some major catching up to do but I know we can do it.

Thanks so much and I will periodically let you know where we are standing and to remind you to click on the button to vote for us!

Please vote...its super easy, even we figured it out!! Just click on the Circle of Moms button in the top right corner of the blog and then find 'The Littlest Lesnaus' blog and LIKE it.

We turned 8 months..a week ago!

8 months...how do these months keep adding up? And I know each month I say during the last month you have gotten more fun but it is the truth. We now officially have kids that are a blast to hang out with. You giggle, you belly laugh, you love being part of the action, you try to give kisses with big open slobbery mouths and it is the greatest, you like being held by others but you love being held by mom and dad best, you steal each others toys and you don't like being kicked or having your hair pulled by a sibling. There is nothing greater than watching all of my kids play and interact. This is happening more and more as you guys have become less baby-like. I feel I should still have 4 newborns but right before our eyes you are growing up and becoming individuals instead of a set of four. It is awesome. People often group you together because you are quads but you are all so different...

Kenzie you need to do everything first. You could be mistaken for a little doll but you are mighty. We often laugh because you are so tiny but you will not let anyone put you in the category of being a 'baby'. Daddy just said the other day that you are going to be walking around here soon but will hardly be taller then the couch cushions. You love laying on your belly in your crib looking out the nursery door and watching everyone. You are the messiest eater. I don't know how you do it because mom is pretty good about keeping faces clean with the spoon but girl you still get it everywhere. I love you peanut and I love the little girl you are becoming.

Tate you are so happy. You remind me so much of your brother Drew who rewarded everyone with a smile. You have no enemies unless someone is wiping your face. We now take a dry mop to the floors after you are done with your bath because you get water everywhere with your splashing. Soon it will be time to start using the big tub! Your ab muscles are way better than moms and dads because you do sit-ups all day long. You want to sit up so bad but just are not quite there yet. You have found your thumb and when you can't find your pacifier you will resort to that handy dandy thumb. I hope you always stay the happy little boy you are. It will get you far in life.

Rylan you love being held and played with. You get bored easily and I probably respond to you the quickest because you have a cry that just gets to me. You are very much like your sister Aubrey in that you do not require much sleep. You sleep hard at night but naps are spent moving around in your crib. You have learned how to kick your aquarium on so you have music to keep you entertained. We now keep the blind next to your crib open part way because mom is nervous that you will find the strings (mom needs to get  cordless blinds soon!) and you love sticking your feet through your crib and kicking at the window. You do not like tummy time at all but love sitting up so that you can reach all of your toys. You remain our old soul and someday I hope you fill me in on all your wisdom. I love you Rylan James.

Isabella you have grown into such a beautiful little girl. Your eyes are so big and blue. Your smile is huge and your checks are plump with a ruddy tone to them. You are so beautiful my little love. You look like Aubrey but your personality is Natalie. You have a love for blankets and will not fall asleep unless one is draped across your face. As soon as you have your blankie you turn on your side and asleep you go. Jumping in your jumperoo is a favorite of yours. You have also really started to babble and it is so fun to hear all of your stories. Occasionally I think I hear 'mama' but I know it is just sounds you are trying out. I am trying to teach all four of you 'dada' first. Mama is used more than enough around here already so we will use Dada with you four! You are so much fun Isabella and remind me often why I love being a mom every time you smile.

Mom and dad are often told that we 'have our hands full' and our response now is 'isn't it awesome'. We love you guys so much. You have brought our family so much joy. The other day mom and dad were sitting at Disneyland with Natalie & Aubrey. There was a family sitting next to us with a mom, dad and a little girl. One of your sisters commented that she didn't have any brothers or sisters. We then asked both girls if they wish they were an only child or if they liked having a big family. They both smiled and said that they liked their big family. I could not imagine not having a single one of you. Yes it takes us longer to go places, we may not go on vacations as often as some and you all may wear more hand-me downs than your friends but I do know that as you all grow up you will have so much love and support surrounding you. 

Happy 8 months to my littlest loves.

A Challenge

Last week our family spent time down in LA visiting the happiest place on earth (a post coming all about Mickey and Minnie!). We had a blast but of course all good things come to an end and it was time to come home. Drew had caught a cold, the babies were starting to show signs of getting the same cold, we needed our contraptions so the babies could do something other than be held, be strapped into their stroller or play on the floor, & as Natalie said we needed our cozy beds. On the way home we stopped at Denny's to feed all of our little birdies. Denny's is not a top choice for me but we thought that it would be less crowded than some of the dinner places in the town we stopped in. Let me tell you we were talk of the restaurant but it was all nice comments. Every time someone came into the restaurant the waitresses would walk them past us and tell them our family dynamics. Paul and I couldn't help but smile since we found it quite humorous after we had been in the car with seven kids for five hours. Half way into our meal our waitress came over and asked us if there was anything else we needed. She also let us know that our tab had been paid by the man who had been sitting behind us. Paul and I were in a complete state of "wow". I think that is the word both of us uttered as we looked at the empty table that the gentleman had been sitting at. Natalie and Aubrey asked us what had been paid and we explained to them what someone had done for us. Natalie asked if it was like when we pay for peoples coffee at the Starbucks drive through? It was indeed. 

It felt amazing to have someone pay for our meal but I can tell you that it feels even better to pay it forward. I challenge each one of you to pay it forward this week...buy someone a coffee, mow your neighbors grass or bring up their trash cans on garbage day, offer to watch your friends kiddos for two hours so they can enjoy some time without kids. Not only does it make their day but it will make yours too. You will be amazed that once you start paying it forward little things will start happening for you too. And if you have little sets of eyes that are watching your every move they start seeing you pay it forward and before you know it they find it just as much fun.

My challenge to you is to make someones day whether you know the person or not it will make them smile and may just make someones day go from not so good to great!

So nice when they listen to their music without us having to listen to it to but now they fight over the ipod!

Rylan is only interested in a toy if someone else has it!!

She didn't even know we had taken the bottle away. I think someone was a little tired!

She loves her sister.

Keeping Easter going a little longer!

I am sooooo behind in blogging. I have so much I want to write about and document for the days when I want to look back and smile about our crazy, chaotic, awesome life. But we are busy, but a good busy. The weather is nice which means lots of times spent outdoors. RSV season is over and family trips to Disneyland have been taken. Paul and I are both getting out of the house with our full time jobs. Time just seems to disappear. So this means I am behind and our Easter pictures are coming a full two weeks past the actual day but I guess I will use the old phrase "better late than never"!

Happy Easter!!

I have decided I have a new favorite holiday...Easter. I love the meaning of Easter and the resurrection of Christ. It was so fun (& difficult) answering all of Natalie's and Aubrey's questions about the death and resurection of Jesus this year. It is amazing the questions that four year olds ask and sometimes figuring out how to answer them so that said four year olds understand is tough. Who knew parenting would be such a challenge at times! The reason I have decided Easter is now a favorite is because my children get such joy over finding 2 cent Easter eggs filled with candy that mom sneakingly throws in the trash. I think the kids hunted for eggs seven different times and they were just as excited with the seventh one as they were with the first. They also could hardly contain themselves as they looked high and low for their Easter baskets on Sunday morning. Paul said we will need a bigger house just to hide baskets in the coming years because of course they remember where they were hidden the previous year so we can't hide them in the same spot two years in a row! We asked the girls Saturday night where they were last year to make sure we didn't have a crying kid the next morning when their basket was in the same spotas the year before because there was no way Paul and I remembered where we hid them a full 365 days ago.

Easter Egg hunt #3 with the Moms of Multiples group

Love this picture that another mom captrured of us.

 

We had the traditional dying of Easter eggs, the annual breakfast of danish and eggs that stained our fingers before mas, a wonderful time at my sisters and sugar highs to end a beautiful Easter Sunday.

A wonderful idea that someone shared with me that I want to share with others is when it comes time to "hunt" for eggs, give each kid a color and they are only allowed to put that color egg in their basket. Boy does it help with the "she got more eggs than me" tears!